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I didn’t even know what to say to Kevin when he told me that Sal told him that she loves him.

Other than thinking WHAT THE FUCK! ARE YOU SERIOUS???

I kept quiet and let him continue the story.

He told her,

“No Sal, you don’t love me and I don’t love you. I love my woman Harmony and my daughter Kayla – that is my family.”

Now if I was feeling emotional before this phone call due to Star’s birthday and exF’s surprise visit, I was now feeling positively sick.

Why the hell would she call him to say that???

We didn’t stay on the phone for much longer. I had suddenly run out of anything to say, and whilst I didn’t want to end the call, I couldn’t bring myself to carry a conversation as my mind was ticking overtime.

So we said our good nights and I tried to fall asleep.

Not very successfully though, so instead I tried to figure out Sal’s intentions. Whilst Kevin is by no means bothered by what she said and considers the matter over [men can be so naive]; I know women too well to let this go.

Then a few pieces started falling into place.

Kayla hadn’t seen her mother in a few months, and not since Kevin and I started seeing each other. However, she went to Sal on Monday afternoon to have her hair done [Sal is a hairdresser].

I don’t know for certain, but I’m pretty sure that Kayla innocently told her mother that her dad was seeing someone, and how serious it was.

And I’m assuming that Sal isn’t too charmed by this idea. And the only reason I can think of – since he’s dated plenty of women since her – is that she has figured out that it’s Me. The Harmony that she partied with before.

Oh … and she wanted Kevin to marry her when they had Kayla and he always told her that he would never get married, didn’t believe in it and all the other bachelor blah blah blah’s … now he’s met someone and a month later wedding bells are chiming.

At about 02h00 in the morning the buzzer rang, and thinking it was Kevin who had psychically felt my unease and dashed off to my rescue, I jumped out of bed to answer the intercom.

Alas. It was one of Star’s old friends wanting surprise him.

Seriously? At that time of the morning?

I still couldn’t fall asleep, and not wanting to disturb Kevin with an text, I sent him an email.

I can’t sleep …

I think I’m also overwhelmed by emotions from yesterday …

The excitement of Star’s 21 & being so overcome with emotion. …

The disappointment of you not coming over …

The frustration at A’s father pitching up & then filling her head with
promises I know he won’t keep …

The shock at you telling me Sal saying she loves you ….

So my mind is swirling with too many thoughts …

And my emotions have dipped to an awful low …

All I want is to be in your arms right now …

And then the buzzer rang just now and I jumped up with excitement thinking it was you …

But it was one of Star’s friends …

So I climbed back into bed and curled up under the duvet …

But I still can’t sleep …

Missing you …

So much.

I still struggled to sleep and spent the rest of the morning having short naps with bursts of restlessly; and when my alarm went off at 06h20 I noticed an email from Kevin sent at 05h38.

I fell asleep with such a heavy heart, I did not know what was wrong with me. I knew I should have called you last night again…

My love I will call you from now on as soon as I get a bad feeling….

I really feel bad about last night… but know that in a few hours you will be in my arms….

Know that I will always love you with all that I am and all that I will be

I miss you….




And he attached the song All That Matters by Justin Bieber [and we all know how I feel about The Biebs]

And because my man thought that I wasn’t sufficiently cheered up, he has since sent me another song; because when we are at a loss for words, we borrow from others, and he knows how much I luuuuurv music.

*Sigh* I really do love this man and appreciate all his efforts to get me out of my funk.

Oh and Sunday … it’s Meet the Parents Part 3. [does that make it Little Fockers?] He met Mother Dearest a few weeks ago; and last Sunday I met his folks [who gave me the thumbs up]; and this weekend he gets to meet my clan; parents, brothers, sisters-in-law; nephews, aunts and a cousin.

~ ♥ ~